Been ages and I don’t know what has been stopping me from blogging. I wouldn’t blame it on work for I had always found time to write and not the want of events either. There had been some over which I could keep writing until I feel bored of expressing them in different ways! But today, the thought of day after tomorrow has pushed me to write this in a last minute effort to feel closer to the best ever times I had had back home in India, celebrating Diwali.
The only thing I like about religion are the festivals it holds. A reason to celebrate, a reason to unwind and feel childhood every passing year. It feels shocking to me when some of my friends tell me that they don’t celebrate Diwali because they have grown up. Is this how you grow up? To lose the celebration, the anticipation and the fun? And a few of them turn environment conscious and child labour conscious and stop celebrating. This is a baffling paradox. India is such a huge country with a huge socio-economic barrier. Let there be no blame game, instead there could have been support. You stop the purchase of fire crackers since the NGO’s shout that the majority of them have child labourers and if you don’t buy them, who is going to feed them anyways? So, why cant there be support and regulation and then everyone is happy! Instead there are these emotional stories, pictures and advertisement which makes you feel like a pathetic human being every time you light up a sparkler. Truth be told, I’ve never felt that way.
Escape from this feeling and then here comes the environment friendly part. It is ok for the government busses to emit pathetic gasses all around the year. It is ok to sell doctored petrol and diesel and even give emission clearance for vehicles even without checking it. It is perfectly ok for the roads and traffic to be chaotic which increases the emission and it also perfectly fine for huge trucks and lorries to roam inside the city limits during day time and most important of all, parks can be converted into IT parks, trees can be cut to make broader roads, lights and blarring speakers can be run 24 hours for political purposes. And now you have rules for a one day celebration to protect the environment. No firecrackers before 6AM and after 11PM and no high decibel crackers. Wow, the government really cares!
Diwali is one festival that turns every grown up into a kid. For people who realise this, welcome to the club. Else, thanks for reading until this! I used to love the celebrations in my apartment. Loads of kids in the age group, juniors to whom we were heroes and seniors who were heroes to us. It was perfect. 12 Midnight used to witness intense competition on who lit the first firecracker of the season and after the first one burst, we used to go back home to prepare in the more traditional way. Oil bath and prayers and then off at 4AM in the morning with the back of crackers, candles, incense sticks and matches. I love the smell of crackers and the color of my hands after an intense session of bangs and poofs. Sulphur and Phosphorus and burnt paper. Combine this smell with the ones emanating from several kitchens in the apartment cooking elaborate festival meals and you can get an idea how heaven smells like.
The first session of fire crackers used to last until 8AM and after that is a pause to stop the bursting hunger inside the stomach. I don’t know why, but the sweets taste more divine when eaten with the chemical smeared fingers :P Though for weakly immune people the side effects could be a disastrous stomach! The early morning Diwali special programs on the television were a treat and a time killer until the next bursting session would start. The day would be filled with visits to my grandparents house and if lucky, my cousin brother’s visit to grandmothers would coincide and creative naughtiness would be at the peak. New firecrackers would be manufactured by us by reverse engineering the existing ones and certain experiments have taken place that would rise several eyebrows!
I felt the same intensity every year, the same anxious wait for this festival and the same restlessness. This is my third year away from this festival and I miss it, dearly.
Showing posts with label childhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label childhood. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Friday, July 17, 2009
Stage fear and beyond
I still remember my first stage appearance from my kinder garden days. May be because it has been repeatedly reminded by my parents and from the recording I have of the lines I had to recite on stage. It’s funny, because at that age, you know nothing about stage fear. You are not bothered about the huge crowd in front of you. All what you think about is how you look in your costume! I was in total love with the police costume that I had to wear. I even wore that dress on a school day and stood out from the class for doing such a thing. The very first lines I spoke on stage “police aaga naan irunthal, polla thirudanai pidithiduvaen, kaali sirai il adaithiduvaen, kambi yenna vaithiduvaen” (If I were a police, I would catch the notorious thief, hold him in an empty cell and make him count the bars).
After this performance, I didn’t get the chance to deliver dialogues on a stage until 1998. For some strange reason, I was chosen to play the role of Nehru in a play. I had to recite a few lines, emote patriotically and wear a costume. Stage fear showed its colors. I had to practice this several hundred times and still, seeing the entire school in front of me, I went numb and sweaty. The rose pinned on my shirt fell down and caused much laughter which made me even more nervous. How I spoke those lines, I don’t remember now, but it was over!
Its funny how life transits and how behavioral characteristics change and influence. Two years later, I still could not overcome stage fear during a simple intra school cultural event and exactly one year later, I was an orator. A change in school did the magic and the determination that this new crowd should never see me sweat or stammer during a talk. Credits go to my parents who framed my talks that time.
Now I crave for the stage. It’s like marijuana to me. Every talk I hear, I feel I could have done it better and I show that in the opportunity that I grab. I feel let down if some one does not utilize an opportunity to dazzle. The latest incident being a researcher messing up precious 10 minutes in front of 25 Noble laureates and hundreds of international researchers and several funding agency directors. What a stage it was and what an opportunity to make yourself noticeable and envied. Where else would have been the perfect place to glorify the scientific greatness on India and showcase India’s greatest research works and contribution to science. It was the perfect platform to bring to notice the great Indian scientific works that would have received the Noble prize if not for a racially biased committee. And he stood there, blabbering bits and pieces of his research work in English that was incomprehensible. I am amazed that the Indian government that nominated this group took so lightly the importance of these ten minutes. I couldn’t recover from this for a week and until I lit up the stage with my performance in the DFG at Bonn.
I don’t know what takes over me these days when I board the stage. I can reach out to the entire room without the microphone and tell confidently that no one gets bored or sleepy when I talk. I feel like a whirlwind thrashing with utmost ferocity to show it cant be matched against and until its there, it has to be respected. The awed look on the audience face tempts me even more to talk. I felt highly satisfied after my talk on 10 July, especially when officials from DFG praised me and when they told me that they too got excited about doing research once again, to actually step into the lab and start making things happen.
I have inspirations too. Very first is Rangarajan of Alma matter. Hearing his speech changed my outlook towards public speaking. Next comes Cho. I like his fierce dictation and slap stick humor that he vents out on politicians regardless of their power. Then my dear father. I like his style when he stands in front of the mike, his spontaneity and the way he observes and builds upon his speech as and when he talks. Finally, APJ Kalam’s motivatory content.
After this performance, I didn’t get the chance to deliver dialogues on a stage until 1998. For some strange reason, I was chosen to play the role of Nehru in a play. I had to recite a few lines, emote patriotically and wear a costume. Stage fear showed its colors. I had to practice this several hundred times and still, seeing the entire school in front of me, I went numb and sweaty. The rose pinned on my shirt fell down and caused much laughter which made me even more nervous. How I spoke those lines, I don’t remember now, but it was over!
Its funny how life transits and how behavioral characteristics change and influence. Two years later, I still could not overcome stage fear during a simple intra school cultural event and exactly one year later, I was an orator. A change in school did the magic and the determination that this new crowd should never see me sweat or stammer during a talk. Credits go to my parents who framed my talks that time.
Now I crave for the stage. It’s like marijuana to me. Every talk I hear, I feel I could have done it better and I show that in the opportunity that I grab. I feel let down if some one does not utilize an opportunity to dazzle. The latest incident being a researcher messing up precious 10 minutes in front of 25 Noble laureates and hundreds of international researchers and several funding agency directors. What a stage it was and what an opportunity to make yourself noticeable and envied. Where else would have been the perfect place to glorify the scientific greatness on India and showcase India’s greatest research works and contribution to science. It was the perfect platform to bring to notice the great Indian scientific works that would have received the Noble prize if not for a racially biased committee. And he stood there, blabbering bits and pieces of his research work in English that was incomprehensible. I am amazed that the Indian government that nominated this group took so lightly the importance of these ten minutes. I couldn’t recover from this for a week and until I lit up the stage with my performance in the DFG at Bonn.
I don’t know what takes over me these days when I board the stage. I can reach out to the entire room without the microphone and tell confidently that no one gets bored or sleepy when I talk. I feel like a whirlwind thrashing with utmost ferocity to show it cant be matched against and until its there, it has to be respected. The awed look on the audience face tempts me even more to talk. I felt highly satisfied after my talk on 10 July, especially when officials from DFG praised me and when they told me that they too got excited about doing research once again, to actually step into the lab and start making things happen.
I have inspirations too. Very first is Rangarajan of Alma matter. Hearing his speech changed my outlook towards public speaking. Next comes Cho. I like his fierce dictation and slap stick humor that he vents out on politicians regardless of their power. Then my dear father. I like his style when he stands in front of the mike, his spontaneity and the way he observes and builds upon his speech as and when he talks. Finally, APJ Kalam’s motivatory content.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Back to childhood II: Snow wars
Earlier were days splashing in water when it was the first rain of the season and then as years passed by I gave it up but making paper boats for streams of rain water didn’t change. It’s the second winter here in Germany and I felt getting back to younger childhood days in the first snowfall of this winter and the first ever major snowfall in my life. Though I was here last winter, the skies failed to appease my yearning for the whiteness but this year, the wait and thirst was more than satisfied. Winter came early and so did the snowfall. It is the most beautiful experience.
After dancing and enjoying the Diwali night in Aachen, we started out to hit the bed at around 1.30AM only to discover that it had snowed and was snowing like crazy. The entire road was white. The shrubs, trees and the parked cars were coated with inches of soft fluffy snow! I held my palm out to catch a few and felt the chillness as the snow melted in my hands. I also caught a few on my tongue! The temperature was minus 3 with soft wind guiding the snow fall. We walked through the white pavements occasionally making snowballs from the snow collected over the cars and aiming the person walking in front.
After reaching the destination, we decided not to call it a day, but to begin it in the snow! Everyone was so excited and we left our mobiles and purses safely in the room. Gearing with coats, caps and gloves, we walked the snow covered lawns and awed at the white trees. The colour of the street lights made the scene more magical. After reaching the place with the maximum collected snow, it was time for snowball fights. Seriously, I never had so much fun. Though fingers sting when collecting the snow, it is definitely worth the pain to dodge and get hit with! We even made snow cigarettes by pressing and rolling the snow and smoked with our breath through our mouth!
Finally our first snow man was ready. Well, from the size, he may be a snow child, but that was what we could manage without proper equipment and gloves. I felt like Calvin making his famous snow monsters! As our snow man braved the cold sitting on top of a BMW, we retired to the cozyness of heated rooms and blankets. I really felt like a kid, let loose to enjoy however he wanted to.
After dancing and enjoying the Diwali night in Aachen, we started out to hit the bed at around 1.30AM only to discover that it had snowed and was snowing like crazy. The entire road was white. The shrubs, trees and the parked cars were coated with inches of soft fluffy snow! I held my palm out to catch a few and felt the chillness as the snow melted in my hands. I also caught a few on my tongue! The temperature was minus 3 with soft wind guiding the snow fall. We walked through the white pavements occasionally making snowballs from the snow collected over the cars and aiming the person walking in front.
After reaching the destination, we decided not to call it a day, but to begin it in the snow! Everyone was so excited and we left our mobiles and purses safely in the room. Gearing with coats, caps and gloves, we walked the snow covered lawns and awed at the white trees. The colour of the street lights made the scene more magical. After reaching the place with the maximum collected snow, it was time for snowball fights. Seriously, I never had so much fun. Though fingers sting when collecting the snow, it is definitely worth the pain to dodge and get hit with! We even made snow cigarettes by pressing and rolling the snow and smoked with our breath through our mouth!
Finally our first snow man was ready. Well, from the size, he may be a snow child, but that was what we could manage without proper equipment and gloves. I felt like Calvin making his famous snow monsters! As our snow man braved the cold sitting on top of a BMW, we retired to the cozyness of heated rooms and blankets. I really felt like a kid, let loose to enjoy however he wanted to.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Railway stations
After more than two weeks, time wants to test me, whether I will write in the after hours of my work and I succeed! Wanted to write about this for a very long time, about something uncommon.
Railway stations.
Railway stations have always been my fascination. I love everything about them and here I will describe about some that have played a very important role in my life and some which I have enjoyed.
Tiruchirapalli Junction or TPJ is the first one that always brings back the sweetest memories. Early morning 5AM is the time when Rock Fort express will enter the well light Junction and I always used to press my face against the window to see the train entering the platform. The smell of early morning in TPJ still lingers around. Way back in 1990, the station used to be filled with the smell of burning coal and oil and after the advent of Diesel and Electric engines, only the smell changed a bit and not the charisma.
My parents used to take me to this station every time I wanted an outing for they know that is the best place to satisfy me! I enjoyed seeing the steam engines pulling the carriages for coupling with the mail line and loved the coupling process. It was here I got my first ambition, to become an engine driver.
Karur station is another beautiful place. Especially in the evenings of October. We used to go to Karur for performing Utsavam to the Thanthondri Perumal (He who appeared by himself) and catch the return train at around 9PM back to Chennai. To the station we used to reach by 7PM and being a restless boy, I just can’t sit still. The station is simple, not a big and complicated one like TPJ. Three platforms, out of that, one unused in the middle, wooden benches, lots of trees and one very old building in the entrance. The breeze will carry the smell of Neem and I used to walk the entire length of the station a dozen times before our train could arrive.
Tambaram, now a junction, is also a very nostalgic one. No roof and the sun used to pierce everyone in the afternoon. The reason why I love this station is because of the brilliant Bonda and the Vadai available in the VRS. My grandfather used to take me in the electric train from Mambalam to Tambaram, get me Aaloo bonda there and then bring me back home. This was the everyday routine for me until I joined school and after that it became a weekend ritual!
Thirumailai, a station with romantic memories! An unforgettable journey with my peppermint started here. Situated above the Buckingham canal, Thirumailai is also a very simple station. Being close to my home, it always kindles memories of TPJ for me whenever I cross it and that was everyday!
Koln is one station that really made me miss home and TPJ. It was around 11PM in the night when I entered the station from Bonn. Had to wait in Koln for an hour to catch my train to Muelheim and that one hour made me relive my childhood and boyhood days. There is a big dome that covers nearly half of the station and the lights are yellow. The breeze enters into the station, bringing with it the wetness of the Rhine running just nearby and the moon casts a shadow of the magnificent cathedral standing just outside the station. The length is long and evenly spaced with seats. I sat down there, away from the roof, and then came flooding back all these memories.
Railway stations.
Railway stations have always been my fascination. I love everything about them and here I will describe about some that have played a very important role in my life and some which I have enjoyed.
Tiruchirapalli Junction or TPJ is the first one that always brings back the sweetest memories. Early morning 5AM is the time when Rock Fort express will enter the well light Junction and I always used to press my face against the window to see the train entering the platform. The smell of early morning in TPJ still lingers around. Way back in 1990, the station used to be filled with the smell of burning coal and oil and after the advent of Diesel and Electric engines, only the smell changed a bit and not the charisma.
My parents used to take me to this station every time I wanted an outing for they know that is the best place to satisfy me! I enjoyed seeing the steam engines pulling the carriages for coupling with the mail line and loved the coupling process. It was here I got my first ambition, to become an engine driver.
Karur station is another beautiful place. Especially in the evenings of October. We used to go to Karur for performing Utsavam to the Thanthondri Perumal (He who appeared by himself) and catch the return train at around 9PM back to Chennai. To the station we used to reach by 7PM and being a restless boy, I just can’t sit still. The station is simple, not a big and complicated one like TPJ. Three platforms, out of that, one unused in the middle, wooden benches, lots of trees and one very old building in the entrance. The breeze will carry the smell of Neem and I used to walk the entire length of the station a dozen times before our train could arrive.
Tambaram, now a junction, is also a very nostalgic one. No roof and the sun used to pierce everyone in the afternoon. The reason why I love this station is because of the brilliant Bonda and the Vadai available in the VRS. My grandfather used to take me in the electric train from Mambalam to Tambaram, get me Aaloo bonda there and then bring me back home. This was the everyday routine for me until I joined school and after that it became a weekend ritual!
Thirumailai, a station with romantic memories! An unforgettable journey with my peppermint started here. Situated above the Buckingham canal, Thirumailai is also a very simple station. Being close to my home, it always kindles memories of TPJ for me whenever I cross it and that was everyday!
Koln is one station that really made me miss home and TPJ. It was around 11PM in the night when I entered the station from Bonn. Had to wait in Koln for an hour to catch my train to Muelheim and that one hour made me relive my childhood and boyhood days. There is a big dome that covers nearly half of the station and the lights are yellow. The breeze enters into the station, bringing with it the wetness of the Rhine running just nearby and the moon casts a shadow of the magnificent cathedral standing just outside the station. The length is long and evenly spaced with seats. I sat down there, away from the roof, and then came flooding back all these memories.
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